“The biggest commitment you must keep, is your commitment to yourself.”
-Neale Donald Walsch
“Self – care is not selfish or self-indulgent. We cannot nurture others from a dry well. We need to take care of our own needs first, then we can give from our surplus, our abundance.”
Commitment issues is a term usually used when referring to a romantic relationship, but applicable to many areas of life. It can be defined in simplest terms as a fear of commitment, an inability to commit to a situation that requires dedication to a particular long- term goal or relationship.
I have never liked making goals. For me, the idea of crafting and dedicating myself to a goal has always seemed like a sure fire way to set myself up for failure. Dream too big and I’m stuck with an unattainable, lofty, and frustratingly idealistic goal. Yet, if I dream too small, I find myself settling when I could have done so much more. As a result, I have, for the most part, stopped making goals for myself. There is no 5 year plan because the most I am able to do is plan for tomorrow, and this week if I’m lucky.
I have no problem committing to my work. I pride myself on finishing way before deadlines with high quality outputs. I have no problem committing to a relationship, friendship, or otherwise. Other people are no problem.
It just seems to be me. I can’t seem to commit to myself with any longevity.
I start personal projects that are never completed, try New Year’s resolutions that don’t even make it to February, make personal goals and plans that are never carried out. Regularly running, scrap booking, painting, just to name a few. It’s like I can commit to everyone and everything else, but myself, and it’s got to stop.
As a new mother, I’m still working out the balance of “being mommy” and “being me” – right now there is no balance. I don’t spend enough time taking care of myself or doing things for myself and it results in an overwhelming feeling of stress that makes it difficult to do anything else but care for my daughter. It’s not fair to me, but it’s also not fair to her.
I want to do better because I need to be better. I have to set a better example.
So this next month (April) I’m going to make some goals.
1) I’m committing myself to this blog. I will try to post at least once a week.
2) I’m committing myself to try knitting everyday. I’ve always wanted to knit, and although I’m starting off kind of slow, I’m trying to learn. But, can someone tell me why I’ve got so many added on stitches!!?!
3) I’m committing myself to some “me time.” At least once this month I will take myself on a date. Nothing fancy, but just some “me time.”
4) I’m committing myself to following up on this post 🙂
How do you commit to yourself? When there are so many other things to take care of in your world, how do you make time for you?